i had my first good quiet time in a long time
here's to discipline and keeping it up

“whatever cultural shifts take place around us, whatever socio-political concerns claim our attention, whatever anxieties we may feel about the church as an institution, Jesus Christ crucified, risen, reigning, and now in the power of his atonement, calling, drawing, welcoming, pardoning, renewing, strengthening, preserving, and bringing joy, remains the heart of the Christian message, the focus of Christian worship, and the fountain of Christian life. other things may change; this does not.”

– j. i. packer

so i'm doing a lot better this week
it feels like the fog has past, which is really nice
assessments are still overwhelming
i still miss china and wish i could be at retreat this weekend (the first i've missed in three years)
but it's ok
i'm here now and i'm going to try contentment.

in other family news
it's dad's last work day ever
my grandma is really worried about her son who is about to die
and my brother is getting married in september

i can't wait to finish this semester

sorry that my thoughts are all over the place
it's how i think.

this is how my head feels today
a bit foggy and muddly

last night i was reminded of a song that we used to sing at youth in china
i was reflecting on the lyrics and couldn't get over how great they were
i love that the words are true.

let no one caught in sin remain
inside the lie of inward shame
but fix our eyes upon the cross
and run to Him who showed great love
and bled for us
freely you've bled for us

christ is risen from the dead
trampling over death by death
come awake, come awake
come and rise up from the grave
christ is risen from the dead
we are one with Him again
come awake come awake
come and rise up from the grace

beneath the weight of all our sin
You bowed to none but heaven's will
no scheme of man
no scoffer's crown
no burden great
can hold You down
in strength You reign
forever let your church proclaim

o death, where is your sting?
o hell, where is your victory?
o church, come stand in the light
the glory of God has defeated the night

o death, where is your sting?
o hell, where is your victory?
o church, come stand in the light
our God is not dead
He's alive, He's alive!

christ is risen by matt maher.
go listen to it

"i hate how distance brings such separation" - mimi.
such truth in those words.
it's something i've been thinking about lately.
will i be close friends with the people i met in china again?
if i go back, will they be there?
or will we meet somewhere else?
and what will our friendship be like?
maybe that's why it's so hard to say goodbye sometimes.
so much changes, nothing is ever the same.

maybe that's not true for everyone
but i'm guilty for being an out of sight out of mind/contact person
i find it hard to keep up with people who aren't around me
maybe because it makes me miss them more
and it hurts once you hang up.

i'm finding it hard being back